


Suspiciously Congenial

by DreamerInSilico



Series: Original flashfic [5]
Category: Original Work
Genre: F/F, Humor, Millennial Humor, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-01
Updated: 2019-02-01
Packaged: 2019-10-20 14:32:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17624201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DreamerInSilico/pseuds/DreamerInSilico
Summary: Prompt: "You’re happily going about when you vanish in a cloud of smoke. Suddenly, you’re standing in a ring of candles. A sorcerer holding a tome looks pleased at your arrival. Turns out Earth is Hell, and we’re the demons, and you’ve just been summoned."





	Suspiciously Congenial

**Author's Note:**

> Part of my on-going effort to make sure all my fic is archived here. Originally posted on Tumblr.

I’ve always been the sort of nerd to spend way too much time thinking about what I’d do if suddenly directly confronted with the existence of the supernatural (or find out I’m in the Matrix, or whatever), so it didn’t take me too much time of blinking at the pentagram and rather intimidating set of runes I was standing in to figure out what must have happened.  

“Huh,” I said, raising my eyes to the rather gothy-looking young woman who was holding what must have been a spellbook and looking at me triumphantly.  

“Huh,” she said, the triumph slowly shifting to something more quizzical.  

I remembered something, and straightened my spine.  “Wait, wait, I’ve so got this.  **WHO SUMMONS ME?** ”  

Really, my demon voice was surprisingly strong and resonant.  I was pleased with myself. 

She seemed taken aback.  “Uh, someone who thought you’d be…”

“…not in jeans and flannel?”  

“Among other things.”

“Yeah, well, I think there’s some surprise on both sides here.  But honestly, okay, wait a sec, what year is it?” 

“Um… 2018?”  

Shit, maybe this wasn’t what I had honestly kind of been hoping for, after all.  

“Who’s the President of the United States?” I asked, holding out hope a little longer.  

More confusion from my summoner.  “What’s the United States?”

Yes!

I couldn’t help it, an excited (and apparently at least a little scary, because she took a step back) grin broke out on my face.  

But wait - 

“…How are we both speaking American English, though?”

“We’re not, whatever that is; I put a translation clause in the summoning circle.” 

“Oh, good, perfect.”

“…You seem way too happy about all this.” 

I looked her dead in the eye, still struggling to contain my glee as I tried to communicate my joy as succinctly as possible.  “Look, where I come from… my friends and I… we literally joke on a regular basis about how the world actually ended a few years ago and we’re living in Hell.  Finding out that’s actually kinda probably true in a way is pretty great, honestly.” 

She considered this for a few moments, then seemed to accept it with about as much aplomb as I had the fact that I was apparently some kind of summoned demon.  

“Alright, well, since you’re here and you’re happy about it… what can you do for me?” 

I didn’t really feel like I’d suddenly gained any spooky demonic mojo, so I took the honesty route.

“Well, I can cook pretty well, sew passably… I have an advanced degree in engineering back home, but since magic works here I’m not sure how useful that will be… I give great backrubs, and I can beta-read your fanfiction like nobody’s business.”

It took a while to actually convince her to let me out of the summoning circle (and by then, let me tell you, I  _ really _ had to pee, wow), but all things considered, I’m sure there are worse ways to meet one’s future spouse.

 


End file.
